Letter 2: Meet me.

Dear Sacred Friend,

Thank you for meeting me in this uncomfortable space- at such a vague vantage point in my life. I asked you to meet me here because it is in these moments that I can reflect on my life, feel alive and strategize in order to work towards a positive change in myself and community. I bare no shame when walking you through the heavy parts of my life in these moments.

Let's focus on our breath and be for a moment in time as I move my ego behind. 

Currently I'm living in the "space between"- as it is known. Post grad life led me here. Although I am working to re-channel my anxiety, brought on by 4 years of disconnect from the familiar, its untamed presence can make existing in this temporary space unbearable.

Anxiety fogs my focus, clouds the clarity I seek, and brings about a boat load of self-doubt. Beyond my personal feelings, I wonder how I fit in the larger picture so in the following post I'll grapple with the prevalence of anxiety within the black community.  Furthermore, I'm interested at looking at mental health issues as public health issues from three different stand points:

1. As an epidemiologist I would ask: how do anxiety disorders affect the black population?  Anxiety in black people is poorly diagnosis in the Western world. In fact, we are under-diagnosed for anxiety or panic disorders, but are over-diagnosed for Schizophrenia, for example.  How does such a false and harsh diagnostic affect black patients? How does this further tarnish our relationship with mental health professionals? Where do we seek help and treatment instead? How/where else is the disorder showing up?
2. As a behavior scientist would ask: What programs can I design to lessen the symptoms of anxiety in the black population?  I've researched the role of ethnic identity on the symptoms of anxiety in black people and found that having a strong and positive ethnic identity may "serve a protective role among African Americans by moderating the relationship between discriminatory experiences and psychological well- being. An Afrocentric perspective may also contribute to reduced anxiety due to a greater emphasis on a present versus future-oriented worldview." (Chapman et.al 2012). What programs already exist and what are their clinical implications?
3. As a health communication specialist I would ask: How can I effectively and creatively change the negative behavior associated with anxiety. What information is important to disseminate about anxiety in the black community?

In the following posts I wish to take a mental and public health stance on anxiety in the black community in hopes that highlighting our struggle will spark dialogue, help me to affirm my passion for public health, and aid me on my journey to total wellness.

wondering thoughts

by Dymond Phillips

http://blackartinamerica.com/

In addition to actively writing, reading, and surrounding myself with a positive like-minded crowd, actively seeking work like "Wondering Thoughts" by Dymond Phillips has helped me to be more appreciative of the moments we have in the "space between." What wonders surround us. What power we have to tap into. Come with me. I am comin'. Remember to write back. -kj

Letter 1: Welcome me back.

Dear Sacred Friend:

It's been far too long. How I miss our honest conversations in the dim lit room before dinner. Me emptying out my observations, feelings, and secrets of my imagination before being re-energized and filled by Granny's feel good meals. Realizing just how much time has grown between us, is unsettling. You were my Peace. 

When that heavy feeling in my chest went to knockin', I knew the correct response. I was no deer in headlights as the signal to write was clear. T'was an urge so compelling it would make the average person squirm in discomfort. This knockin' would send calm eyes bouncing from one corner of self doubt to the next. When you don't know what your heart is telling you, confusion, fear, and even anxiety may ensue.   

 Exposing my truth without hesitation in a space that shielded me from all the worldly judgement and pressures freed me so. What Peace you afforded me in good measure. Allow me to use this blog to catch you up. Know that I am comin', just be sure to write back.

(This blog is a creative way for me to re-engage with the act of truth telling or honest writing, which will be personified here as "Sacred Friend" in each blog post. Hope you find what you're looking for. Peace. kj

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